I never get what I want. But life is never fair anyway

Hey there,
Just want to confess about my disappointment in my life this time.

Did you know that I never get what I really want in my life ever?
Especially when the things relate to other people. Where I don't use my own power to achieve it.
That is why I lose faith in people. When my desires involves other people, I'll automatically drop my expectation and rest assure. Calming myself down and pat myself on my shoulder, saying to myself 'Calm down and expect less. You won't get those anyway'

So yes..
It's only natural for me to be disappointed. Because I never put a high hopes on people.
So, when I don't get what I want, I won't sulk. Just suck it up and let it go. Because it's only natural for me to be treated that way.

And you, my friend, can you please grow up and stop thinking that the world revolves around you?
Please. I know you're in sadness right now. But just suck it up. It's not like it's not your fault anyway.
Plus, this is just a small matters. Why are you behaving that way? It kinda get annoying these days.
Maybe what natural to you is that you being treated like a princess all the time. Desired by people and you can have everything that you want just by saying it out.

I know, different people have a different capacity to hold stresses and stuff. I've tried to understand you for a long time. But I just can't anymore because it really get on my nerves -_-

I am very sorry. I was supposed to be the usual me, that one friend who will surrender to grant her friend's wishes, that one friend who'd leave all her works behind just to get to her depressed friends for some consoling session and stuff. But that was the old me.

The new me know about self worth. The new me point out exactly what she want, and she value herself more than everything. And won't feel guilty about it at all. Because I just love myself.
So, lets just suck things up adn get along with life.

Cheers!

#InLoveWithMyself
#IhatePeople
#NotaPeoplePleaserAnymore

Life become so hard when we get older

Maybe it's my fault for always acting that way.
But, have you ever realized of all the things that you've done to me?
Isn't I am just trying to reciprocate the things that you did to me?
I'm getting tired.

I've been giving you chances after chances.
I even forget and cancel about moving on after all those thing that you've done to me.
After you hurt me that bad. I tried to forgive and waved it off so that we can always start over.
Yet, every week, things only ended up the same. I don't know about you.
But things sure is taking it's toll on me.
I've messed up with my life, ignoring my friends and family. Just to entertain you and to make sure you'd feel wanted.

Now, I don't know what happened to us.
I don't know where'd I done wrong this time.
Should I always be the one who'll raise the white flag and apologizing?

I could've leave and be with other people who'd ready to offer me comfort, be my best listener and adviser. Yet, I choose to stay because I'm a loyal person.
Unlike you who'd just run away and hurt me whenever we stumbled upon some rock.
It really is tiring. It hurt so bad this time, just like before.

So...I can say that I am currently stranded between staying or leaving.
I've been trying to be more understanding.
I know you're busy with your works. I don't mind that at all.
I know you need your own space to be with your friends, just like I did.
But still, I am not good enough. And I don't know where did I've done wrong in this?
I've been trying to figured out my fault, but I can't.

Maybe our relationship shouldn't exist after all.
Maybe we weren't meant to be with each other.
Maybe we're not good enough for each other.
Maybe we shouldn't even try fixing us anymore?

My good friend asked me to 'move on' for good and value myself first.
He asked me to run away from a jerk like you.
So, if, in case you're reading this like you usually did back then before I fall head over heel for you, I'd like you to know that I want to try to end our relationship once and for all. I wan't you to vanish from my life just like what you usually did every week. But this time, I want you to gone forever. Don't ever try to reach me when you're bored or needed consolation or if, by any chance, missed me.
Just go and vanish. GO!

#Iwanttomoveonsobad #GODgivemecourage #hopingforamiracle

Moving on day 42

It was supposed to be day 42 since I finally move on.
But, the feelings came back.
Because I absent-mindedly try dipping my toes in the same lake and taste the water.
That's what you get for trying the same thing that you've known would hurt you again, twice Ula!

But, ever heard of the advises the brain kept on giving the heart?
Why? Because the heart are stupid. The heart never really give up on those things called feelings.
That is why, I hated myself.

I want to continue to move on.
Let's do it!
I can do it!!!

#morning #ramblings

Moving On day 33

Its been 33 days since the moving on phase started. What I feel now? Is neutral.
It still hurts. But at least it is not that bad anymore. At least I can watch that person in a 'normal' kind of way now.

Less than 2 weeks, I believed things will turn cold again.
Before that time comes, I shall get prepared and be cold. Yeap. Be cold.
I know its cruel. But at least this time, I've shield myself from getting hurt.
I want to love myself ^_^

#bai

back to december.

Well..after a few days, I am back, again.haha

The heartbreak?
I'm over it now. Maybe not completely 100% moved on yet, but at least, I am OK.
Things become normal between us.
But if you ask, yes. I still hope I can go back to December and change everything -_-
The regret though~hmmm

anyway, its a bz life lately. But here I am, taking time and do stuff very slow.
Please pardon my slow-ness.lol
But I hope I can do all my work perfectly!

Pray for me!

#bye

Not everyday is a day where you can run under the bright sky

Some other days, there are storm and all you can do is keep yourself inside.
Safe from the rain and storm.

I've tried my hardest to forget about that one person and eventually did.
It wasn't so hard anymore. But, now I feel lonely and empty inside,

Its sad when we no longer have that long conversation at night before sleep.
When you no longer concern towards my health and etc.
Sounds like a very selfish relationship?
Well, I am that demanding.

Dear future person,
Please remember this, I am a demanding person.lol

Got to find a distraction for myself very soon!

#movingonday## #causeIdontcareanymore #lulz

#movingon #day11

Its been 11 days since I've got my heart broke.lol
and it hurts a lot the first week. But I managed to get a hold of myself.
Finally, last sunday, I've decided to let it all go and be free.

Monday, when he called, I don't feel anything superior like before anymore.
I am happier and felt free that he didn't affect me that much anymore.
Tuesday, which is today, about 20% of the old feelings came back.
But I refuse to accept the fact.

I am stronger than this.
Never again I will fall for you.
Never again I will hold any romantic feelings towards you.
Because every time the old feeling came creeping back inside of me, you always decided to be a jerk and do something that would eventually hurt me.

I guess, I am more free than before. From the feeling, your shadow and you.
So, I want to be happier and forgot about you as much as I can.
Lets just stay as friend then ^_^

Now, I want to focus on my study and fall in love with my work.
Cheers and good luck to me! :D

#movingonday11
#counting

Our heart is not that bright, that is why we have our brain.

I don't usually fall in love,
but when I do, it's with an asshole, jerk and unemotional guy who changed heart very quick.
That is why, I don't do the 'falling in love' stuff.
I don't want to lose my composition. As if I am cool enough with the 'composition' that I have now. lol
Because I know, the outcomes of that 'falling in love' stuff will not be pretty.
You know what you'll end up with when you're wasting your heart and love? Yes, pain and heartbreak.

You might experienced somewhat of a bursting heart, constant happiness and smile and you'll feel like everything move in a slow motion when you're in love. But during the heartbreak, you'll see everything in black and white, everything is just dull no matter what you do. Even your favorite sitcom isn't helping, your favorite food will taste like crap and you refuse to talk (even if you're a talkative type) to anyone, and you know what? You will feel like crying all the time. You heart feel like it was stabbed a million times and its like someone or something is constantly compressing your heart inside. Yes, it hurts like that. Actually, its hurt a lot.

You'll find yourself listening to Taylor Swift's song and other heartbroken song too.haha

So....I don't do the 'fall in love' stuff. I guess?
But I am just a human, I can't really control my feelings. So, instead of falling hard, I put a boundary to make sure that even if I fall, I won't fall too deep to climb my way back up. So that at least I can still see some light.

So, teenagers, girls, woman, when you want to fall, don't fall too deep. Cheers.

Good Morning by the way!

#comingback

Good Morning Baltimore

Well..thats just a song title up there.lol
Its been a while, again, since my last post.

Im thinking of coming back and write regularly just to kill time and bored-ness (if you know what I mean). But we'll see later.

Lot of thing happened lately. and July definitely not a good month.
Its rather an emotional and painful month. My usual self will shut down and turn off every time July came. Wanna know why? Maybe later.hohoho

Anyway, good morning and have a nice day! ^^

Come back home. Baby come back home!

Assalamualaikum.

Yes, as usual. I am back after being on hiatus for several week (is it a month or a few month this time? I hope its not!). and yes I have a lot of stories in store.

I've been busy with this lil-oh-not-so-secret biz that I got myself involved in.
and busy with the interviews, busy with documents handling (for my mom's company), busy with the chores, busy managing the household, this and that. In a nutshell, my energy almost drain and left empty at the end of the day. But still, its worth it.

My families being worried too much about me going to a far place and started working.
What I can say is that, almost 90% of them encourage me to further my study. It is also the first time in my life that my family set a goal for me too! and I was kind of anticipated too! and I will apply to continue my study to satisfy everyone too! (too many 'too. oh well~)

Yes, it is the very first time that my family set a goal for me.
Before this, they never asked me to get straight A's in any exam. To nail anything or accomplish anything..it's kind of funny yet give me some new vibe when they finally asked me to do something.haha
ok..I know it is not funny.

Remember about my 'fear of flying' things that I mentioned in each and every one of my previous post?
Yeah right. I am scary shit of flying right now. I have a bit of fear before the MH370 cases because of the little incident occurred during the flight. Also probably because I tried to understand the mechanical of the plane, I studied aviation a bit, history of aviation and also I learnt about the construction material of the plane. I always imagine a weird stuff though. So I should probably stop my wild imagination.
Then, come the MH17 cases. Then some few other airlines cases too. I became terrified and scared to fly now! I should probably cancel the 'Willing to travel.' in my resume too.haha

Gaza.
The war in Gaza is getting worse. The only hope that is left is Allah the Almighty.
May HE give protection, strength, iman, patient and all the good thing to the people in Gaza, Amen.

Last but not least, my mother became so very hilarious this past few months(or years..or forever).
She said she didn't want me to work at a far away place. and thet she will treat me something that I can't decline if I stay here. 'If you want to work far away from Ranau, go and get marry fast. So that I didn't have to worry anything about you, Go get married!' (thats what she said when its translated from Dusun to English). I was like... shocked, loss of words and my mouth was slightly apart trying to find the right word and tried my very best to register her order. So I play along and asked her to find a candidate instead.

Mom can get so scary sometimes you know.

Lets keep the other story and go to sleep now k.
Good night! :D

I'm MUSLIM. and I am proud. I am not a terrorist. I love everyone.

My family,
Most of them are of different religions.
My best friends, soul brothers and sisters, are also of different religion.
and I love the to death ! *kissie kissie*

Today, I just want to brag about something that I kept in me for a long time now.
and it bothers me. So I decided to post in on Facebook.
1 minute later, I delete it...

Because there's a lot of people who get offended easily when it comes about religions.
So I don't want to cause chaos. So i'll just post it here. kbai

It's annoying when people keeps on complaining the 'rules & regulations' of my religion. Well, we have some 'do's and don'ts' in our religion. I bet yours have some too. We respects yours, why don't you respect ours? 

p.s.im not trying to be religion-ist here.

I wonder why do people call muslim as [insert all the bad & offensive-words here] when we tried to follow our religion rules and stand up for it.

What about you? Do you get offended when people with different religion says that your religions rules is wrong?

‪#‎no‬ ‪#‎offence‬ ‪#‎really‬ ‪#‎ohmyenglish‬ ‪#‎but‬ ‪#‎whatever‬

oh yeah..probably because of the mistake done by my muslim's brothers/sisters..ikr...

Good Night! :)

Pray For MH370

I was shock when I woke up one morning (you call 10 am morning huh) and discovered that MH370 flight  to Beijing lost just like that. and loooooots of thing/drama is going on. Facts are on and off and some of it was not logic at all.. (esp the Maritime team who lost the yellow thingy that the fishermen found. How ridiculous!)

Also lot of drama from the people who even connect the missing flight with politics and made fun of it.
I was upset when people are even laughing at the incident. Have you even feel/lose people that you love? If your loved ones died in front of you, fine. But have you ever lose someone that you love so much and that your loved one is still in unknown location and cannot be traced? Well...ask me..because I did. And it felt so hard! 1 minutes feels like forever.

I am so sad. I can feel the feeling that the victims(?)'s family feels right now. I even cried for them. It must be hard. Thinking where could our loved ones be right now. Are they safe or what is the worst case scenario that could happen to them? These past few days, every morning when I woke up, I will spontaneously checking my phone and access to the news and internet to check in hope that the flight will be discovered. Even just one single sign is enough. But till now, there's not a single solid discovery (as of yet!).

Dear families of the victims,
Be strong. Things will not always be the same.
In case the worst case scenario did happened, I pray to dear Allah to give you strength and bless you with patience and faith.
But there's still a light of hope for something better right? Insya'Allah..

When Allah wants it to happen. It will.
I, myself, become so frightened of flying since I've (and the other passenger of course!) boarded a plane from KK-KL involved in severe turbulence (which is not a big deal after all. But everyone is still scared) and an emergency announcement was announced. Now, with the missing flight, I am beyond terrified!

Let us pray for MH370.
Come back home MH370! Everyone wants you back! We misses you!

Fear of Flying. How do I get rid of it??

Assalamualaikum reader(s)!

Just reach my University (its early..i know. but duties call!hahaha), and my last semester's result are very dissapointing. What can I say...less study?lol
and since I've come back from my not-so-relaxing-holiday, I got lot of work to do in lab. I even stayed in the lab till late at night..straight until Thursday and join safety process training on Friday and Saturday.fuuuh enough?kekeke

So...let's cut the long story short!
I have this fear that I've kept for a few months now..it's the fear of flying.
I know and understand the principle of the plane and how its works very well..but I'm still scared!!
It's started on that very day where we experienced a worst turbulence and there's an emergency announcement announced (ok!confusing!!). I just thought that I am going to die that day!
But alhamdulillah...Allah gave me the chance to breath until now..until i'm 23 (motif?)...

Since that day, i've been so scared to board on a plane!
But then, all my travelling (at least 4 times per semester) requires flying on a plane (dayum!)
I've tried to calm my nerves down through the whole journey though..and divert my attention to some movies and drama provided. BUT STILL!!!!

Thank God that I manage to get a grip on myself and hold myself together from screaming out loud during the journey (or at least every time there's a turbulence).

How do I get rid of my fear?

Internship ended. Going back to Pahang!

Assalamualaikum uols!

LI iols dah tamat secara official hari tu (6/7/2013) and iols rindu nak p kije.huhuhu
Lotsa things and knowledge that I gained during my internship period and the most important thing is that,
I learnt to cooperate and do things together with my teammates.
Usually, kalo d U, I like to do the project myself. I mean, I'll just take my part and do it alone without asking any of my team member's opinion. But no. During my internship, I learn to respect and take others opinion.
Thanks to my teammates and my supervisor, also to the other officer who really helped me through everything during my internship period.

For those yang akan ber-internship, I wish uols good luck and never be afraid of it.
Dulu iols sangat takut nak p intern + neves kemain. duk dak duk dak jantung. tapi bila sampai, everything is good. Just that, please be yourself but don't annoy others!hehe

Baiklah!
Lecture and classes supposed to start at 9/7/2013. and I still haven't go back and attend any class yet.kekeke
Due to some problem, I have to postponed my 'going back' thingy. I am so sure that there's no class/there's no important things going on in class.hehehe..banyak betul alasan.

Anyway!
I am going back tomorrow. Travelling alone AGAIN! *sigh*
It's boring and lonely. But actually travelling alone is like, more convenient..hehe

Its sad!
Its so sad to leave home!
Its even sadder to leave family!

Goodbye Sabah!
See you again in about...1 and a half month or so? lol


#nyte
# preparing my brain for this semester subject!

Malindo Air Malaysia

Assalamualaikum peeps.

Just got back from Sabah below the wind and a lot of project, assignment, task, presentation(and maybe quiz & test) are waiting for me. yippie! I've read a famous blogger's blog about Malindo Air, where he only stated the best about Malindo, and I feel kinda cheated.haha (I'll continue about this later. It's not a VERY BIG deal anyway)

So I've decided to try Malindo, depart from KK to KL. I purchased the tickets online, since there's only 3 flight to KL can be choose, I decided to take the earliest flight, which is 11 a.m (stated online). I reached the airport(it depart from KKIA(T1) from KK and landed at KLIA) at 10.05a.m and rushing for check-in. 

When I asked the pacik tukang scan beg about my bag, he said the gate was closed. Ok, acceptable. The only thing that is unacceptable is that, there's a poster in front of the counter, it stated that luggage must be checked-in 3 HOURS BEFORE DEPARTURE??? o.O

So I proceed to the check-in counter to get my boarding pass since I can just bring my bag as hand carry items when the Miss at the counter inform me that the gate has closed and I cannot take the flight. I still have 40mins before 11a.m at that time. When I tell her that my flight was at 11a.m(according to the e-ticket that), she inform me that Malindo DID NOT HAVE ANY FLIGHT FROM KK-KL AT 11A.M they only have a flight at 10.30 A.M for morning..  and I was like, 'so, apa la ni kena tulis di itinerary?' and her face changed when she take a look at my itinerary and contact someone via walkie talkie. So I was allowed to go on-board. Thanks kepada macik yg bagi laluan kepada sy untuk scan hand luggage yg sy bawa, juga kepada pacik2 & abg2 sekuriti yg tidak tahan2 sy dan minta macam2.hehehe

Upon my arrival at the gate where I was supposed to board the plane, there are still a lot of people Q-ing outside. and it's 8 minutes past 10.30 am(the time where the plane was supposed to depart) that time. and the services of ripping(hantam ja ba ayat) the passenger's tickets are quite lousy I can say. Some of the pacik2 pun sampai marah2 and are having a bad mood due to their service & unclear announcement.

But inside the plane, 

 We can do this. We can simply connect our USB to the tablets provided. The tablets are more touch sensitive than the one in Malaysia Airlines. Which is good, but...please refer below.

Pastu dalam plane pun, pramugari semua baik2 dan peramah. Kalo lelaki lagi la suka, suda la pramugari-pramugari dia lawa-lawa pastu pakai pun siksi-siksi belaka.kekeke

BEST :
1- Spacious. Jarak antara kerusi sgt luas berbanding airlines di Malaysia yang lain. This one is the best!
2- F.A semua peramah & baik. Hospitality is number 1 you know!hehehe
3- Free food. Sandwich and mineral water. Sila berterima kasih sebab kena bagi free food. suda la tiket murah gila :)
4- Comfortable seats.

NOT BEST :
1- Lousy management before boarding into the plane.
2- I really have a big problem about the 'LUGGAGE CHECK-IN 3 HOURS BEFORE DEPARTURE' thingy. Sometimes, all you want is not a cheap price, sometimes, it's all about keselesaan.
3- Please, if your flight was at 10.30, change the time in your flight schedule online. It'll confuse people :-/
4- Food. I know it's free. I don't actually mind it, THIS TIME. because I am not that hungry. But it'll be better if the airline provide(or sell) a variety of food selection.
5- Limited entertainment selection. There's only like 14 movies in there if I'm not mistaken? :-/

The above is my opinion about Malindo Air. It is cheap, but cheap is not everything. and I know it's new. So bear with it for a while.hehe

I might still fly with Malindo.. but bak kata Yunalis Zarai (Yuna), I choose product that I trust...
So I prefer Malaysia Airlines, mahal tapi boleh komplen banyak-banyak dan komplen itu dilayan walaupun ada sesetengah worker yg marah-marah atau poirodus mau melayan. But hel* I care.kekeke

p.s.I was actually watching Malindo logo for a long time during the journey and find it funny. Lion with a wing. how cute! :P

My last post.

Few people mistaken my last post as full-of-vain post.haha
Things that I wanted to tell people are simple,

WHEN WE'RE BLESSED & FORTUNATE,
BE GOOD & GRATEFUL. DON'T LOOK DOWN ON UNFORTUNATE PEOPLE.

as simple as that.
night peeps! :D

Mentally(retarded) exhausted.

Greetings peeps!

Have you tried mentally exhausted before?
Yes. It is not a food and does not taste good either.

I am so very tired today!

It might be due to no-stop Test coming. I have a test on last Thursday(the first test), I have another Test on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday this week. Plus, a quiz on Monday evening. pheww~ I am so glad that it all ended(I wish it all ended very well too, aminnn).

Although my face may look calm and cool for the test, inside, I almost crumble and give up. Thank God I didn't. haha

Even my friend was afraid looking at my face in the last class just now. We're having trouble calculating this and that. and our lecturer keep on giving us his answer which is different than our answer. It's frustrating you know!

I am so tired and needed sleep right now, walaupun I've slept more than 7 hours today.haha

There's a burger on my left on keropok lekor on my right, so why don't we go for a movie or 2, right?

When I Google image for 'Mentally Exhausted', this oppa came out. Mucho gusto! :D

#movie!

I am Forever Alone

Assalamualaikum :)

People that have my Facebook, Twitter and Instagram might always seen me uploading the picture of my pet cat (pet dog pun ada, tp blum pernah upload. will upload 'em very soon :P) and must be wondering, 'why the he** is she always uploading those pet of hers picture?' when other people usually upload their family, boyfriend, friends and their own picture.

Let me confess, at home, everyone was busy working. During holiday, I go home, but I am all alone, staying at home with all the pet. I have no one to talk to (but I actually talked to my pet) and that is why you'll find me very silent. I am a very silent person, unless you're a friend of mine, or a crazy person. If you are those stated, then I will be the one who's talking bla bla bla...

Walaupun selalu sendiri di rumah, I am still want to go back home!biar la lonely2, yang penting happy!
Kesian kan hidup saya? I have no one to talk to, I usually cooked and have lunch alone, tengok TV pun sendiri. But that doesn't change my relationship with my family. When they come home, we will have this very looooong conversation, fighting about the show on TV and taking notes of their comment on the food that I cook.

Still wondering why I kept on posting my pet pictures on Fb, twitter & Insta?

#nyte

Human

Assalamualaikum.

A proper introduction this time.hehehe

Some people are obsessed with being skinny, have a white flawless glowing skin and bla3 so that they will look perfectly-perfect all the time, especially to the people around them.

Certain people wasted hundred or thousand ringgit every month, just for those products that they believed are able to grant their wishes to be what I called 'perfectly-perfect'.

Woman? Oh..of course not. These days, even man, a real man, pun beli juga produk-produk kecantikan ni.

Yang paling popular sekarang ialag Beutskin Essence. Why am I always talking about these stuff anyway?haha

mungkin sebab ramai kawan-kawan yang consume ini barang. Yes.Memang berhasil. Jadi putih, etc2...tapi, it'll cost you a few thousand because the effect can only be seen after using the product for at least 2 months if I'm not mistaken.

What encourage me to write about this kind of stuff is that, I've seen a lot of people bought Slimming Pill. Slimming pill actually works. But only for those under the observation of the doctor and only for those with *cough* diabetes *cough*. Before taking the pills, everything includes allergy, health history & etc2 were taken into consideration.

But, what about those yang beli pil pelangsing di gerai-gerai atau kedai jual jamu? or worst, online?

Si penjual tu pun apalagi kan, mestila jual temberang dia juga. Mau kasi laku jualan.

And last 2 weeks, during the vacation with my family in Tawau, I playfully asked the mak cik yang jual-jual di gerai yang berdekatan dgn tempat saya shopping, 'mak cik, sy mau beli ubat kurus' and the makcik 'shhh' me. She said, 'jangan cakap kuat-kuat' samsil ambil galah & jolok-jolok di upper part gerai dia. When I ask why, she simply answered this, 'ubat-ubat ni tidak melalui kerajaan, kena seludup saja'. What she meants by kerajaan is KKM and of course la taxes.hehe

What surprised me more is that, when she showed the 'ubat kurus' that she hide, one of them was LAMI.

Yes people, go and search about this LAMI pill on Google.hehe

I've read once about Lami. It's poisonous and very-very dangerous. A lot of death was recorded due to consuming LAMI. Jadi jangan la try. If you're that desperate to look kurus, just go and try, but don't regret it later :(  Memang tidakla saya beli kan..

So, untuk menjaga hati makcik tadi, saya belilah gloss yang dia jual. Dari Indon kononnya.hehehe

Enough with ubat kurus thingy.

Ada pula yang sanggup habiskan beribu-riban untuk membeli produk kecantikan wajah. SK-II contohnya?

memang tidak salah la, it's your money, not mine.haha

I'm just talking & mentioning here~

People,*muka bajet-bajet penceramah* and myself.

Why do you have to care about what other people say or MIGHT say about you?

If they called you 'ugly', called them 'super-ugly'. Konfem menangis-nangis tu belari.

Because only orang yang perasan cantik yang sanggup panggil orang lain 'ugly' dan orang yang perasan cantik itu sebenarnya tidak berkeyakinan diri! Hence, bila orang panggil dia 'ugly' dia akan menangis.hahaha

boleh ka buat assumption macam tu? :P

Who are you to judge?
err...I am not encouraging anyone to be gay, emo and athiest, what I'm trying to say here is that,
It doesn't matter who you are, what you are, how you look like, at the end of the day, we are human. We eat, we sleep and we want to love and to be loved.

Just smile and held your head up high! :)

#nite

I want to be like CHOI SEUNG HYUN

Who the heck is Choi Seung Hyun? You can click HERE for more.

You know BigBang? Ever heard of T.O.P BigBang? YES. Now you know Choi Seung Hyun.hehehe

I am not going to discuss about his age, how handsome he is, how popular and hot he is or his whatever.

Why I wanted to be like him? Check this out.

Shock? Oh wait...don't understand? Ok...

All of the picture above, except for the first picture was Choi Seung Hyun (T.O.P) before his debut.

Shocking???! I know, right. hahaha

He work hard to get in that gorgeous shape of his and manage to loss 20kg's in 40 days. After losing the weight, only YG Entertainment accepted him to become apart of YG's family.

Hebat kan? :o

Why I wanted to be like him?

It's not that, I wanted to be slimmer or loss weight(well, kalo dapat loss weight pun apa salahhnya kan??:D)

It's just that, I want to have a determination and continuous motivation like him.

I hated myself so much, for I do only hold on to my determination half way and 'dushumm!', that determination will be nowhere to be found.

Let's cut the long story short, jadi lah macam T.O.P suda la hensem

he have this determination to get what he want.

If he can do it, we can do it :)